Week 14 - Everything I Want to Remember

How far along: 14 weeks exactly

Total weight gain/loss:  Current weight = 102lbs

Maternity clothes:  Wore a pair of maternity pants yesterday but mostly wearing my regualr clothes with my Bella Band - maternity clothes are still too big

Stretch marks: None

Sleep:  Interrupted and never enough of it

Movement:  Have felt a few little flutters but not sure if it's movement or just gas :)

Cravings:  No specific cravings but I love the smell of coffee

Aversions:  Changes day by day

Gender: Unknown at this time and I have no particular feeling one way or the other

Symptoms: Tired, tired, tired

What I miss: My energy!

What I look forward to:  Next ultrasound on June 3 when I get to find out of this babe is a boy or girl

Moods:  Too tired for moods

Milestones: Every new week is a milestone

Medical Concerns:  A low placenta, a cyst on one ovary, a subchorionic bleed/hematoma and a nodule on my thyroid (biopsy pending)

Weekly Wisdom:  Try to enjoy every moment of pregnancy

Worst moment this week: None.  The glass is half full!

Best moment this week:  Every moment with Cub Scout where I get to give him my full, undivided attention

In Happier News

Just to balance today's previous bad karma post I thought I'd post something happier.

We saw little Baby Scout at my 12 week ultrasound a couple of weeks ago.  Cute as a button that little Baby Scout is.  S/he gave us a perfect profile view and we saw a strong beating heart.

Cub Scout continues to fascinate me every day with how fast he learns and grows.  He's now putting together three-word sentences.  His favourites so far are "bless you Daddy" when Mr. Scout sneezes and "I did it!" when he accomplishes something all on his own like stacking blocks.

Cub Scout loves crackers and is always asking for "mow cwacka" - that's his toddler speak for "more crackers."  Some other favourite words of mine that he says are "dubba dubba dubba" for the letter "W", "owside" for outside, "help please" when he needs assistance getting a toy out of the box or putting on a jacket, "yogo" for yogurt, "macanoni" for macaroni.  I never want to forget his toddler-speak, it's so darn cute.

He's a challenge to say the least.  He's at that toddler stage where he's testing limits and asserting his independence.  Some days (many days!) it seems there is more crying/tantrums in our house than not.  But then when you ask him for a hug and he runs and dives into your arms you forget every tantrum in an instant.  The power of love :)

I can't believe Cub Scout is approaching two years old.  It seems like just yesterday he was barrelling out of me ready to take on the world.  He's got personality this child of mine.  He loves to read.  Loves trains. Loves the riding cars outside.  Has a smile that lights up his face and a serious frown just to balance things out - which he gets from Daddy :)  He's got a wild head of hair that takes a lot of product to control, but it's just too adorable to cut.  He's happy and engaging and vocal and full of energy and moody and cuddly and a million other things all rolled into one.  He is the BEST THING THAT EVER HAPPENED TO ME.

How Things Change

Last post I was writing about how I had nothing really to worry about....

Now, that's changed.

It seems I have a "low" placenta.  Which I'm told is not uncommon.  I'm also told that in the majority of cases the placenta moves up as the baby grows.  I was put on pelvic rest as a precaution. That means no exercise and no lifting.  I'm told not to worry about it, and mostly I haven't.

It also seems I have a cyst on my left ovary.  Again I'm told it is not uncommon.  I'm also told that it can go away on it's own.  It hasn't caused me any pain, which is good.   However if I do start to experience a stabbing pain that doesn't go away then I am to call the midwife.  I've also been told not to worry about this, and mostly I haven't.

And, it seems I have a subchorionic bleed/hematoma.  Once again, I'm told it is not uncommon.  And I'm told that it can be re-abosrbed by my body and disappear.  I haven't had any spotting or bleeding this pregnancy, which is good.  If spotting/bleeding develops then I need to call my midwife.  Don't worry about this I'm told, but I confess I have, a little.

And if those three 'minor' conditions weren't enough for an infertile to deal with I've got another bigger health concern that is causing me worry, as hard as I try not to worry.  A nodule was disovered on the right side of my thyroid.  I've learned through my own research that nodules are not uncommon.  I've also learned that most nodules are benign.  However, my nodule has microcalcification.  Microcalcification, according to my internet research, is more commonly associated with malignant tissue.  Malignant, aka, Cancer.  Add to that a strong family history of thyroid diseases and my risk factor shoots way up. 

A biopsy has been scheduled.  It cannot come soon enough.  I need to know, one way or the other, what I'm dealing with.  And how would one deal with a Cancer diagnosis during pregnancy??  As if a Cancer diagnosis on its own wouldn't be bad enough, but throw in a pregnancy and already being a mother to a toddler and it becomes unbearable to even think about.

Really universe??  It wasn't enough that I struggled to get pregnant, you had to throw this shit at me too??  Thanks.  Thanks a lot.